Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle 21

CLAMP – Del Rey – 2009 – 28 volumes

THEY DID IT AGAIN.  Absolutely nothing happened in this volume.  They went to Seresu, and then they went to the castle and sat around and listened to Ashura-oh talk?  Maybe?  Maybe he was showing them a vision, or maybe Fai was talking?  And what does all that past story amount to?  Why should we care what Ashura-ou’s wish was after the end of this volume?  There was a bunch of setup for Fai to grant his wish, but then Kurogane did instead, and something terrible happened and the second curse activated and… what?  That last page?  What was even going on there?  I know it’ll make sense next volume, but I was pretty frustrated with the unclear action scene in this volume.

Secretly, I was hoping Fai would grant his wish and activate the curse of the Ashura-ou.  That seemed to help Taishakuten, anyway.  But that doesn’t seem to be the case.

I’m trying to parse this volume out in my head, but it’s just not working.  I’m too angry.  When will things go back to normal?  When will they start going to worlds and going on adventures to find feathers again?  Never?  Are we just going to keep getting talked to like this until the end of the series?  I’m so sad, too, because I’ve been waiting all this time to see Fai’s past, and it just doesn’t make any sense.  He doesn’t even get to be a wizard any more because his second eye’s gone, and even then, the story would explain things like his magic power grows with use, and then take it back at the end and say that his magic power doesn’t grow with use and that he can use it all up.

ARGH.

My anger was lessened by some of the similarities between the Ashura/Fai scene here and the one between Seishirou and Subaru at Rainbow Bridge in X.  Some of the same images are used, and I think it even uses some of the same goddamn lines (“You musn’t shed tears for one such as I” is an old CLAMP line, and my memory is only letting me plug it into that scene).  I hate myself a little for liking it a lot more because of that, but then, why else am I reading Tsubasa?

Again, I’m going to try and talk through this, so stop reading if you don’t want spoiled.

Spoilers…

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Okay.  I can’t figure out what’s going on, or what the point of this big flashback is.  Is Fai showing this out of anguish?  As a way of explaining himself to Kurogane?  Is Ashura doing it to torture him?  So we know that Fai’s wish is to bring his twin brother Fai back from the dead.  We learn that he commits a tremendous number of spells to memory, but can never master healing or resurrection magic, things that would bring his brother’s corpse back to life (the corpse, by the way, is being kept fresh by a feather, and isn’t alive like Ashura-ou made it seem last time.  Was he just holding it up in that scene, or what).  Ashura rescued Fai and took him with him knowing that he was cursed to kill the first more powerful magician that crossed his path.  Because they both thought that Fai’s power grew with use, Ashura-ou gave him that tattoo he traded to Yuuko at the beginning of the series as a way to cap his magical strength.  Because Ashura-ou was weaker than Fai when they met, but Ashura-ou knew that he would grow more powerful, and his wish was to activate the curse and have Fai kill him, which he couldn’t do if Fai’s magical power kept growing.  He also made Fai swear that he would kill anyone who brought death and destruction to Seresu.  Ashura-ou, being a god of death and destruction, knew he would eventually go on a rampage and kill every soul in the country in order to feed his power, so he hoped Fai would kill him.  Fai couldn’t bring himself to kill Ashura-ou, who was the first person to show him kindness, so he put him to sleep, then told Elda to let him know when he woke up and went on his merry way to Yuko’s place.

This sets the stage in the current timeline, where Ashura-ou still wants Fai to kill him.  Fai can’t, however, with only half of his magic.  Ashura-ou tries to provoke him by hurting and attempting to kill his companions, and he tortures Fai a little bit as well, so Kurogane goes ahead and does the deed, which costs him his ward of protection from Princess Tomoyo.

Fai’s wish is either to bring his brother back to death or to die in penance for choosing his own life in place of his brother’s.  He was planning on killing himself with Ashura-ou, which is the other reason Kurogane intervened.  Ashura-ou says Fai would never be able to kill himself before bringing his brother back.  Killing Ashura-ou caused the feather in Fai’s twin to combine with the soulless body of Sakura, but for whatever reason, it wasn’t Sakura’s memory.  It was the brother’s memory, letting Fai know that he offered his life in exchange for Fai’s.  They’re still talking in third person though, and they have each other’s names, so I’m not 100% sure that’s what’s going on, but it seems to work here.  Whatever.

The second curse, in Fei Wang’s words was “If you can’t force yourself to kill Ashura-ou with your own hands, you will be forced to go somewhere against you will.” Which would mean he’s known he was supposed to kill Ashura-ou before Ashura-ou even showed up?  Or do I remember a line where Fei Wang told Fai he would forget this second curse?  Hmm.  Anyway, after all this horrible stuff happens, obviously Fai wants to kill himself.  I took that curse to mean that the travelers, or at the very least Fai, would be thrown off the path of the journey.  Except, instead of being forced to go someplace against his will, Fei Wang makes it sound like the world of Seresu trapped and was about to kill them.  WHAT.

Fai uses the last of his magic to send Syaoran, Sakura, and Mokona outside the trap, but doesn’t have enough magic left for Kurogane and himself.  Mokona tells Syaoran to use its earring to break the cage, and… uh, Fai tells Kurogane to go without him, and then Kurogane cuts off his own arm and grabs Fai anyway?

What.

Just… what.

I’m not sure how this works, but now I have to read the next volume RIGHT NOW.  That made me madder than anything, but even so.  I need more.  I need to know how this stuff works out and goes on.  I am a ridiculous CLAMP addict.